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February 14, 2007


Scooter Gets an A: Homeschooling

(reprint from October 2005)

If emulation is the highest form of flattery, Dick Cheney should feel most flattered.

Right and left leaning politicians, pundits and journalists ask, in the aftermath of Scooter’s indictments, “ Why ..what could possibly be his motive for continuing to make (false) statements so at odds with the facts, even at odds with his own notes?”

The “Daily Show” has run clips of Cheney ferociously denying having made a certain statement, followed by archive footage of Mr. Cheney saying exactly that. Don Imus, of “Imus In The Morning” smilingly quips, referring to the V.P., “His lips are moving, so you know he’s lying.”

(Mr. Cheney’s hairdresser, one Miss Mila Darcey* who is well known for haircuts in the oilpatch, adoringly opines that people don’t get it. She argues that Dick Cheney, in actuality, is the most honest pol in Washington because he lies so totally, blatantly and obviously. Other politicians at least infer that they are telling the truth. Dick Cheney makes no such effort when he promulgates his oft repeated fatties.)

Having thus been home schooled in the Veep’s contortion of a values’ system, it may well be that Scooter was simply confused.

Craig Johnson

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